5
Jan
2011
The five deadly sins of Mike Holmgren and the Cleveland Browns
The spotlight now falls to Holmgren to get it right. (Source: Cleveland.com)
On Monday, Cleveland Browns president Mike Holmgren went from wise father figure atop a rebuilding Browns organization, to a man under significant pressure to deliver.
It’s one thing to tell a fanbase that Eric Mangini hasn’t met expectations — it’s another to meet them yourself. While Holmgren excels at win-you-over press conferences, it’s his football decisions this offseason that will define his tenure with this star-crossed franchise.
The Browns are about to hire their sixth head coach since their return in 1999. Whoever finally turns the ship around will never buy a drink in Ohio again — but it’s no small task, and one that’s left wheelbarrows of dead along the road out of town.
Here are five mistakes Holmgren must avoid, if he wants to turn this ship around:
MISTAKE #1: Miss on the coach
While some were thrilled to see Mangini swept aside, they might look back and wonder why the move was made if Cleveland goes in the direction some predict.
Holmgren talked about spreading a wide net, but lead candidates for the coaching vacancy appear to be limited to those also represented by Holmgren’s agent, Bob LaMonte. He fronts John Fox, Jon Gruden, Jim Mora, Brad Childress, Pat Shurmur and — ugh — Marty Mornhinweg.
“I don’t want to have to do this again, so I have to get it right,” said Holmgren.
It’s hard to get excited about that “right” choice being Mornhinweg, who went 5-27 as coach of the Detroit Lions.
22
Nov
2010
Brad Childress gets the axe in Minnesota
Chilly is feeling pretty dejected this morning (Photo via RealClearSports)
In a move that should surprise absolutely no one (we called it in our mid-season awards), the Minnesota Vikings fired Brad Childress on Monday and promoted Defensive Coordinator Leslie Frazier to interim head coach.
Reports out of Minnesota suggested that Childress had lost the Vikings locker room weeks ago, and that he had angered owner Zygi Wilf when he cut Randy Moss against his wishes, and without consulting anyone. The “Fire Chilly” movement had grown louder and louder in recent days, and following the Vikings 31-3 loss to the division rival Packers yesterday (which brought their record to 3-7 on the year), Wilf apparently had seen enough.
You can read all about this move at NFL.com, but we’re pretty sure Frazier is going to be an improvement over Childress, and could bring some much-needed leadership and stability to the organization. And now Chilly can go back to his dental practice, or whatever he was doing before he got into football.
12
Nov
2010
5 things intergalactic bounty hunter IG-88 *MUST* terminate in 2010
ALERT: Interstellar hit-droid IG-88 files annual no-negotiation hitlist.
Per usual, aspects and individuals of this NFL season are too TEDIOUS to be tolerated and — MUST BE TERMINATED.
IG-88 hovering above NFL with DETONATION HAMMER. (Source: ratherchildish.com)
REPEAT: Assassin droid IG-88 has identified the following targets:
(1) CHILLY must go STAT. CHILLY has lost control of team. CHILLY to be sidelined PERMANENTLY within minutes of IG-88 entering atmosphere. IG-88 has witnessed locker room float away like a paper boat on windy lake. IG-88 will not tolerate. IG-88, who has carried out a series of successful hits on frigid Hoth, is not intimidated by Minnesota winter climate and will not await Spring to carry out job.
IG-88 vows: Chilly/Favre quality time DONE. (Source: AP)
(2) IG-88 will not tolerate coaching weight-loss spree. Human football coaches preferable to IG-88 when obese/aimless. IG-88 vows to cut cord on overly congratulated coach thinning.
IG-88 prefers NFL coaches King Kong Bundy-like, in order to emphasize his sparse, droid figure. COACH SLIM-DOWN: OUT. (Source: The Star-Ledger)
(3) IG-Ocho-ocho on fast-track, seek-and-destroy campaign to DETONATE Bengal Ochocinco. Tired antics and Twitter banter FAIL have intergalactic hit-droid fuming over Ohio copycat.
IG-Ocho-ocho on Ochocinco: "NEGATIVE." (Source: AP)
(4) Brutally dull London game matchup — international SNOOZE FEST — must be adjusted STAT or IG-88 WILL TERMINATE. One last chance for London game — get right or guns drop.
IG-88 has seen football in London nosedive since the Fridge's stint with the London Monarchs. (Source: NFL.com)
(5) IG-88 is coming after playground bully James Harrison. James Harrison, Pennsylvania-situated tough guy, will come face-to-face with INTERGALACTIC droid nemesis IG-88 and learn dictionary definition of HIT TO HEAD. Photos of confrontation will be printed and distributed to Mohamed Massaquoi and Massaquoi family, and posted to all facebook accounts with last name Massaquoi. Massaquoi family line restored by IG-88, star-system leveler and orbital hit-robot. IG-88 DOES NOT TOLERATE JAMES HARRISON ANTICS. IG-88 waits in wings, witnessing fat/sassy James Harrison mock Mohamed Massaquoi and Massaquoi family name — IG-88 will restore pride to Massaquoi variety of human being. James Harrison and Harrison clan will run for earthen hills following IG-88′s appearance in atmosphere. Pittsburgh Steelers warned: Begin go-forward action-plan for life POST-HARRISON. IG-88 burns toward solar system EVEN NOW and hides in shadows prepared to DROP HAMMER on Steelers me-first, me-only defender James Harrison.
IG-88 plans full termination of PA-sourced bully. (Source: New York Times)
10
Nov
2010
ReadAndReact Mid-Season NFL Awards 2010
Even though a lot of folks were handing out midseason awards last week, this past weekend marked the official halfway point for the 2010 NFL season, with every team now having played 8 of their 16 regular season games. So we thought we’d fall in line with the rest of the sports blogosphere and give out some completely meaningless awards of our own!
So without further adieu, here they are, the 2nd annual ReadAndReact mid-season NFL Awards:
Peyton Hillis has captured the imagination of an entire city (Photo: Cleveland.com)
MVP: Peyton Hillis, CLE - Everyone in the world is picking the other Peyton for this award (YAWN), but nobody has made a bigger impact on a franchise (or a city) this year than Peyton Hillis. The 7th round draft pick out of Arkansas was traded to Cleveland for Brady Quinn and some magic beans, which might turn out to be the worst trade of Josh McDaniels career, and the best of Eric Mangini’s. Since being given the starting workload, Hillis has taken the Browns on his shoulders, leading them to 2 straight wins over the Saints and Patriots. And more importantly, he’s given the team an identity to build around, and given Browns fans something to believe in. Finally.
Offensive Player of the Year: Arian Foster, HOU – what can you say about Foster, who has busted onto the NFL scene this year and leads the league in both yards (884) and TDs (9)? So far, Foster has claimed this year’s title as the stud RB in the league … let’s see if he can keep it going for the rest of the season.
Defensive Player of the Year: Clay Matthews, GB - The 2nd year linebacker has emerged into a dominant force this year, collecting 9-1/2 sacks so far to lead the league. There isn’t another defensive player who’s had a bigger impact on his team, and Matthews should be a mainstay in GB for years to come.
Morris is already one of the best young coaches in the game (Photo: TampaBay.com)
Head Coach of the Year: Raheem Morris, TB - At age 34, Morris is the league’s youngest coach, and his Bucs team is showing that they’re willing to fight to the death for their leader. So far, Morris has turned the team around from 3-13 last year to a 5-3 start, and he’s done it without very much talent to work with (a 2nd year QB, a rookie RB and two rookie WRs). It’s probably too soon for them to put it all together for a run at the playoffs, but with Morris at the helm, the future looks bright in Tampa.
CONTINUE READING FOR THE REST OF OUR MID-SEASON AWARDS
1
Nov
2010
Randy Moss Waived By Vikings, Remixed by DJ Steve Porter
Randy Moss waves goodbye to his latest stint in Minnesota (AP Photo via NFL.com)
UPDATE: We thought it important to mention that Moss hasn’t been officially waived by the Vikings yet. Multiple reports suggest that Brad Childress went rogue when he informed the team & coaching staff that he was releasing Moss. Chris Mortensen said tonight that Childress has “lost the locker room” and Adam Schefter tweeted that several members of the organization want Randy to stay.
Stay tuned, but Moss’ agent has confirmed that he was informed by the team, and it’s hard to imagine a situation where he would stick around to play for Childress now.
____________________________
In a surprising move, the Minnesota Vikings waived Randy Moss today, less than a month after trading a 3rd round pick to the Patriots for the troublesome wide receiver. Moss had an awful game yesterday in his return to New England, with just 1 catch for 8 yards, plus one play where he noticeably quit on a sure touchdown pass after being interfered with (Favre was injured on the very next play). And to top it off, afterward, Moss told the press he was done answering questions for the rest of the season (having being fined $25k last week for not cooperating with the media). He then went on to answer his own questions, volunteering criticism of the Vikings while praising the Patriots.
Moss will remain on waivers until tomorrow afternoon, during which time teams with the worst record will get the first chance to sign him, along with his contract (1-6 Dallas anyone?). But obviously, Brad Childress saw the same things from Moss that Bill Belichick did, and didn’t want him on his team for even one day longer. So any team that decides to take a chance on Moss has to be prepared for the headaches that inevitably come along with him. When he’s not happy, he makes it real hard on those around him.
With that, we bring you the latest remix from DJ Steve Porter, which gives us an auto-tuned retrospective on the career of Randy Moss.
WATCH “ONE CLAP” BY DJ STEVE PORTER AFTER THE JUMP
29
Oct
2010
Favre’s streak reportedly in jeopardy … YAWN
(AP Photo/Andy King via ESPN.com)
UPDATE: Favre participated in practice today on a limited basis, but Childress said he wouldn’t decide on who will start on Sunday until just before game time:
“I am fond to saying 48-hours to game time,” Childress said. “We don’t play until 3:15, I think, East Coast time; still got a lot of treatment time. Can bones heal in 48 hours? Probably not, but (head athletic trainer) Eric Sugarman has a great bone stimulator in there that really does the trick.”
This is starting to remind me of the whole Favre retirement saga … and as such, I no longer care. I mean, this is a 2-4 team with a bad offense led by a gimpy old man. Aside from the streak – which should have ended naturally via one of his recent retirements – this is almost a non-issue. The Vikings would probably be better off with Jackson at the helm this weekend, and that in and of itself speaks volumes.
_______________
The Star-Tribune is reporting that Vikings HC Brad Childress is leaning toward sitting Brett Favre down on Sunday against the Patriots with two fractures in his left foot. This, despite the fact that Favre – who has yet to practice this week and has been in a walking boot until today – hasn’t ruled himself out the game yet. Of course, the big news here is that if Favre doesn’t go, it would put an end to his NFL Record streak of 291 consecutive starts … but that’s still a huge “IF”:
Favre, who has played through numerous injuries during his 20-year NFL career, has “confided” in some close to him he’s not convinced Childress will let him play against New England, the NFL Network also reported Thursday night.
Yeah yeah yeah … I’ll believe it when I see it. Like everything else Favre-related, this feels like just another media-hyped creation to help build up his legend even further. In fact, at least one NFL team doctor said that the injury is nothing more than a “glorified ankle sprain”, and its been speculated that if this were a playoff game, most players would be able to play through it.
They’re going to shoot Favre up with whatever painkillers it takes so he can step under center and take at least the first few snaps of the game to keep his streak intact.
4
Aug
2010
Brett Favre supposedly retiring again (insert dismissive wanking motion)
UPDATE: Aug 4, 2010 @ 13:10pm
This is probably the last time we’re going to post about this guy until the season starts. Given the media’s hard-on for any sort of Favre-related news, we’re going to be subjected to this kind of random speculation for at least the next month. And we’re just not going to ride that ride again.
So here’s the latest (and last from us), via ESPN.com:
Brett Favre told ESPN’s Ed Werder in Hattiesburg, Miss., on Wednesday that he has not made any decision about returning to play for the Minnesota Vikings this season and says he will play if healthy.
Favre’s agent, Bus Cook, said in a statement to the NFL Network on Wednesday that the quarterback has an appointment with Dr. James Andrews next week and will know more at that time. Andrews performed surgery on Favre’s ankle in May.
If you’re looking for Favre news for the next 5 weeks, just turn on ESPN. Trust us, it will be unavoidable.
____________________________
ORIGINAL POST: Aug 3, 2010 @ 13:43pm
So the big sports news today is that Brett Favre reportedly told Vikings teammates and officials that he’s not going to return to Minnesota this season.
The Minneapolis Star Tribune was the first to break the story early this morning, and the sports universe has been all atwitter since:
NFL sources said that Favre began contacting various members of the Vikings on Monday to say he was going to issue a press release Tuesday stating his intention to retire. Favre is not pleased with how his left ankle has responded to surgery in late May.
Of course, this report has now been followed by a statement from head coach Brad Childress that he has not heard from Favre, and is unaware of any decision by the ever-waffling QB. And Vikings kicker Ryan Longwell – one of Favre’s best friends – says he spoke with Favre on Tuesday and he didn’t mention anything about retirement. Either way, you can be assured that the Vikings brass are scrambling tonight to try and persuade Favre to come back for one more Super Bowl run.
Sorry, but we’re not buying any of this for a second. Favre also said he was retiring around this same time last year (on July 28th) and of course ended up joining the team on August 18th. The smart money says that Brett is just making another ploy to get out of training camp, so wake us in a few weeks when this decision may or may not become reality. Until then, we’ll just assume that Favre will be taking snaps in the NFL this season.
Brett Favre told ESPN’s Ed Werder in Hattiesburg, Miss., on Wednesday that he has not made any decision about returning to play for the Minnesota Vikings this season and says he will play if healthy.
Favre’s agent, Bus Cook, said in a statement to the NFL Network on Wednesday that the quarterback has an appointment with Dr. James Andrews next week and will know more at that time. Andrews performed surgery on Favre’s ankle in May.
31
Oct
2009
Brad Childress Halloween Costume Catches Fire!
Thanks to BustedCoverage.com for this one:
Looks like this year’s hottest Halloween costume is noneother than Minnesota Vikings coach Brad Childress (also known to some as the “Amber Alert” look).
Childress, however, may have done them one better.
Brad has balding, bearded followers! (Source: BustedCoverage.com)
9
Jun
2009
Going for broke in Minnesota
One intriguing crumb of the terminally dumb storyline around Brett Favre’s courting of the Minnesota Vikings: Favre would open the season facing his former coach, Eric Mangini, in the Dawg Pound. (I said “crumb”.)
There’s been a fair amount of speculation that Favre and Mangini (a) didn’t get along; (b) were best friends; (c) aren’t speaking to each other; (d) named children after each other, etc. Some have pointed fingers at Favre for helping to end Mangini’s career with the Jets. Mangini and Favre have taken the high road on this one, both have moved on, and there’s realistically very little drama here.
(I can’t believe I’m dedicating space to the Favre Saga, but…) The Vikings are falling into a boring, seen-from-a-distance trap here.
While Favre superficially thrusts Minnesota onto the map (through increased, yet unearned media exposure [see Dallas Cowboys]), his presence puts a young Vikings team on hold for a year [see 2008 N.Y. Jets].
If you’re head coach Brad Childress, do you have the luxury of time?
Under Childress, the Vikes have finished 6-10, 8-8, and 10-6: that’s solid progression. Childress, today, sits at .500, with 24 career wins and losses. With the (increasingly competitive) NFC North up for grabs, would you latch on to a 19th-year quarterback in this pivotal season?
Childress is looking beyond what most of us know. He grew up in the West Coast offense, influenced heavily by Andy Reid and, by default, Mike Holmgren. These are men who see incredible value in Favre’s ability to engineer the West Coast attack, no matter his age.
Experienced head coaches have been known to gravitate toward end-of-career, wisdom-filled quarterbacks. Moreover, what are the alternatives? Childress may counter the (now annual) Brett backlash by arguing that a 50-year-old Favre is better than the ragtag, wandering motley crew of John David Booty, Sean Glennon, Tarvaris Jackson, and Sage Rosenfels.
Per ESPN, if the 39-year-old Favre doesn’t agree to play for Minnesota by week’s end, the deal could be off. If that happens, there’s been talk (or rumor) that the Vikings might pursure Browns QB Derek Anderson (not recent talk, mind you). If not Anderson, someone else may find their way into the Vikings’ fold.
Bottom line: That Childress is going after Favre, surgery and all, does not suggest confidence in Minnesota’s current state of affairs on offense.
Tarvaris Jackson (7) and John David Booty (4) may need to wait another year to win the hearts and minds of football fans everywhere.
