Archive for the ‘Humor/Satire’ Category
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12
Dec
2011
All Tebow Does Is Win (GIF & VIDEO)
(Image via mocksession.com)
Yep, it happened again. After 3-3/4 quarter of some of the worst football you’ll ever see, Tim Tebow and his Broncos somehow pulled out another improbable victory with their 13-10 OT win over the Bears.
And now, after leading the Denver Broncos to their their sixth straight victory (seventh in eight starts), Tebow has officially made believers out of me, his teammates, the city of Denver, John Fox, John Elway, Marion Barber and Bears fans everywhere. While some credit certainly needs to be given to the Broncos defense and Matt Prater for the win, all anyone can talk about today is Tebow.
The naysayers will continue to claim that Tebow didn’t do anything particularly special himself yesterday (despite throwing for 236 yards and a TD), and Brian Urlacher went so far as to call Tebow “a good running back”. But there is just something remarkable about the attitude that he brings to the field, where his teammates all fight until the final whistle, and never stop believing. And after witnessing it in person, I can tell you that it’s a feeling that permeates throughout the entire stadium, with fans understanding that with Tebow on their side, they’re never completely out of any game until it’s truly over.
Plus, the very idea that Marion Barber would inexplicably run out of bounds to stop the clock in the 4th quarter, and then fumble the ball in OT – allowing the Broncos a chance at the win – smacks of divine intervention. Believers will tell you that Jesus himself pushed Barber out of bounds on that play. But regardless of whether you believe God actually has a hand in wins and losses on a football field (we don’t), it’s becoming obvious that someone upstairs has Timmy’s back right now. And the faith he’s instilled in this Broncos team since taking over is nothing short of amazing to watch.
There will undoubtedly be tons of over-analysis this week as to the religious implications of Tebow’s success, and what it means for the NFL in general, but the bottom line for us is that all the guy does is win … as the following clip succinctly demonstrates:
VIDEO AFTER THE JUMP
8
Dec
2011
What might have happened during Ndamukong Suh’s car accident (GIF)
(Photo: KATU.com)
One of the big stories this week has been the mysterious circumstances surrounding Lions DT Ndamukong Suh’s car accident last Saturday. In case you missed it, the already-controversial, anger-prone DT was serving his two-game suspension at home in Portland, where he crashed into a tree after slamming on the gas pedal early Saturday morning. With two female passengers in the car.
Initial police reports – based on his 911 call and testimony given by Suh at the accident – suggested he was merely accelerating to pass a taxi when he lost control of the vehicle, and that nobody was injured. But conflicting reports quickly emerged from both eye witnesses and the two passengers, who came forward to say that Suh lied, and they were, in fact, injured in the wreck. And while by all accounts Suh was sober, there was never any taxi. Suh just floored it when the light turned green in an attempt to show off, losing control before hitting a light pole, fountain and ultimately the tree.
The case has now been amended to reflect the passengers’ injuries and closed by Portland police, who say they have no plans to investigate further. But thanks to the wonders of the internet, we have this tremendous dramatic re-creation of Suh’s accident, and what may have really happened when mayhem struck on that fateful night:
GIF AFTER THE JUMP
1
Dec
2011
Pure Michigan Ad Parody: Lions Fans Redux (VIDEO)
Last year, we posted this spoof of those “Pure Michigan” TV ads that have been running around the country, which examined the sheer insanity of being a Lions fan.Well, they’re back with the 2011 edition of “Pure Michigan: Detroit Lions”, which focuses on the newfound bad-boy image of this year’s club.
With Jim Schwartz (“a madman who can barely stay on the sidelines”) and Ndamukong Suh (“wanted for murder in 11 states”) leading the charge, the Lions and their fans have discovered a brand new swagger … one that just may transcend winning and losing:
To be honest, I’m not sure that highlighting murders in Detroit is going to have the desired effect of boosting tourism in the state … ya know, since they’ve had a bit of a problem with that, and all.
29
Nov
2011
Fake Kyle Orton Says Goodbye to Denver (VIDEO)
After being released by the Broncos and picked up by the Kansas City Chiefs last week, Kyle Orton likely has some mixed feelings about his tenure in Denver. After all, Orton has been on a bit of a roller-coaster ride since joining the team, with Josh McDaniels, John Elway and (most of all) Tim Tebow making his football life anything but simple. So he’s probably looking forward to starting over in KC, and putting this chapter of his career behind him.
Fortunately for us, the guys over at comedy troupe Landlocked Pioneers put together this spoof video of Orton bidding a fond farewell to Denver, with a dead ringer playing the role of a surly, beer-swilling Kyle … who is also clearly hurting inside:
“My rockin Neckbeard!!!
And living in Colorado, I can tell you that they nailed the local references to IKEA and the DIA “demon horse”. Awesome.
21
Nov
2011
Tony Scheffler didn’t get the update that the Flash Mob had been pushed back (VIDEO)
(Image via Sportsgrid.com)
During the 3rd quarter of their impressive comeback win against the Panthers, after scoring the game-tying touchdown, Lions TE Tony Scheffler turned in the most intricate endzone celebration of the weekend – if not the season – with this tribute to ubiquitous the AT&T Flash Mob commercial.
Apparently, thanks to his shoddy cell phone service, Tony didn’t get the text that the flash mob had been moved to next weekend … oops:
VIDEO AFTER THE JUMP
15
Nov
2011
Ochocinco’s new Twitter avatar is the best thing he’s done all year (PIC)
(Image via PatsPropoganda.com)
This hilarious Lethal Weapon 3 poster spoof – with Chad Ochocinco, Tom Brady and Bill Belichick playing the roles of Danny Glover, Mel Gibson and Joe Pesci, respectively - is apparently the new avatar for Ochocinco’s Twitter account.
Good stuff, but this new partnership hasn’t exactly proved to be “lethal” so far. Unfortunately for Chad, it seems as though he’s spending way more time on Twitter than he is studying the Patriots playbook, netting just 11 catches for 201 yards and 0 touchdowns this year. And while it’s definitely cool, let’s not pretend that Chad actually tried his hand at photoshop and created this masterpiece himself … I’m guessing it’s a piece of fan art from one of his nearly 3 million (!!!) followers.
[H/T Pats Propaganda]
7
Nov
2011
Angry fan delivers epic rant to Browns’ “Factory of Sadness” (VIDEO)
Following the Browns’ ugly loss at the hands of the Texans yesterday, comedian and lifelong Cleveland fan Mike Polk, Jr. felt the need to unleash his frustrations on someone or something. And with the Browns playing oh so far way in the state of Texas, Polk found the next best thing to vent on … their stadium, which he has appropriately dubbed a “Factory of Sadness”.
As Mike says in the video description, “Some times it’s nice to just yell at a building”:
Yep. This pretty much sums up the feelings of Browns fans everywhere.
PS – in case you were wondering, Mike is wearing a Ryan Pontbriand jersey … the Browns’ long snapper, who might just be their most consistent player. Perfect.
7
Nov
2011
Mark Sanchez gets two for flinching (GIF)
This right here is why you don’t often see NFL quarterbacks lining up at the receiver position. From yesterday’s Jets-Bills game, watch Mark Sanchez get the bejeezus scared out of him by diminutive Bills CB Drayton Florence:
BOO! (Image via midwestsportsfans.com)
That’s two for flinching, Mark.
Sanchez and the Jets won the game, this certainly isn’t going to help his image as a pretty boy quarterback, is it?
VIDEO AFTER THE JUMP
31
Oct
2011
Antonio Brown’s Touchdown Dance is … um … interesting? (GIF)
When Steelers’ second-year WR Antonio Brown scored his first career NFL touchdown yesterday, helping his team to a 25-17 win over the Patriots, he was understandably overcome with excitement. So much so that Brown was inspired to break out this dance-strut-type-thingy in the endzone:
(Image via mocksession.com)
As much as we love the enthusiasm, we’re not exactly sure what Brown was going for here. Some have speculated that it was a tribute to Billy “White Shoes” Johnson’s “Funky Chicken” (not even close) or the Carlton Banks (maybe), while others have suggested that Brown is mimicking carrying his own big swinging balls through the endzone (most likely).
Either way, we like it. We’re not even sure why, but we like it a lot.
30
Oct
2011
Tim Tebow Gets “Tebow’d” by Stephen Tulloch (PIC)
Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later.
With the ridiculous trend of “Tebowing” sweeping the nation, Detroit LB Stephen Tulloch was the first person to “Tebow” in the face of Tim Tebow himself, dropping to a knee after sacking the Denver quarterback during the first quarter of today’s Broncos-Lions game:
(Image via mocksession.com)
It looks like this whole Tebowing thing is really picking up steam, huh? I mean, it’s mildly amusing now, but give it a week or two, tops, before it’s officially annoying.
VIDEO AFTER THE JUMP
