Paula Abdul reportedly did the choreography for this video (Image via Youtube.com)

Wow. I’ve been a Giants fan for as long as I can remember, but I don’t ever recall seeing this video before yesterday … and it’s absolutely, awesomely & hilariously awful.

Back in the ’80s – fresh on the heels of the Bears’ “Super Bowl Shuffle” sensation – getting sports teams to sing terrible songs and make even worse music videos became the cool thing to do. And during their own run toward Super Bowl XXI in 1986, some members of the New York Giants apparently couldn’t resist the seductive allure of the music biz either.

This video for the creatively titled “We’re the New York Giants” was shot in the old Giants Stadium on a budget of approximately $42, featuring a random collection of just eight Giants players with stars in their eyes, dancing (awkwardly) and lip synching in street clothes to a super-sweet electro/pop synth beat. And holding a deflated football.

VIDEO AFTER THE JUMP

It appears that the song was credited to “Manuel, Headen & Roberts”, which means that WR Lionel Manuel (in the blue baseball cap), backup LB Andy Headen (in the cowboy-meets-pimp hat), and OL William Roberts (in the shades and brown jacket) were the masterminds behind this track. The token white guy is DB Herb Welch, and we spot CB Mark Collins (checkered jacket) in there too, but otherwise we have no idea who the rest of these dudes are … and we desperately want to know who the guy in the white jacket and blue sweatpants tucked into his socks is. If you have any leads on any of the unidentified Giants, please post them in the comments.

We are the New York Giants
Don’t you know we’re great
Football is our business
Pasadena we can’t wait

The New York Giants is our name
Football is our game
Winning we proclaim
And drugs are not our thang …

That’s why we’re winners!
THAT’S WHY WE’RE WINNERS!

Weighty stuff. And as you can see from the pic of the original 12″ (available online for just $9.24!), it was the visionaries at A-1 Creative Records who thought it was a wise investment to put it on wax … I somehow doubt they recouped on this one.

In case you were wondering exactly how Harbaugh has managed such a fast turnaround, we bring you this handy-dandy infographic drom reddit/r/nfl. In it, you’ll see how the Niners’ defense – led by all-everything LB Patrick Willis - has really been the biggest factor, leading the league with 26 takeaways and zero rushing touchdowns surrendered. And as we know, football is a game of field position, and San Francisco’s special teams have also contributed hugely to their success in that department.

(Image via reddit/r/nfl)

One could also argue that the 49ers schedule has played a big role in their success, and many are predicting an early playoff exit for Jim Harbaugh’s club. But they’ll have a chance to prove their critics wrong tonight when San Francisco plays the Baltimore Ravens and John Harbaugh in this brother-versus-brother head coaching matchup.

In the mean time, Harbaugh has his club feeling confident and as relaxed as can be in San Francisco, as evidenced by this clip of OT Joe Staley and TE Vernon Davis singing Adele’s “Someone Like You” from Staley’s “The Joe Show”. These gridiron crooners definitely struggle with the lyrics, and they’re both terrible singers, but they earn points for enthusiasm … especially Davis while butchering the chorus.

VIDEO AFTER THE JUMP

I have a packed day ahead of me. Rest assured I won’t watch a second of sports, as I’m in the middle of writing a vicious term paper for my Women’s Studies major at The New School. I’ve titled it “The Growing Femininity In Office Men During The Chalskian Era (1990-Present): And Why The Female Worker Continues To Be Pushed To The Side.“

My first draft, about 90 pages typed, is in a state of utter disarray — and I’m not making progress mainly because I continue to be distracted by OUTSIDE FORCES. Section 2 is a shambles and I am committed to spending this Sunday line-editing this thing down to its britches. That means no more people calling me with FALSELY URGENT, nonsensical personal dramas (you know who you are, Tamara and Bellsy). I am EXHAUSTED with playing counselor on the phone when I have a MASSIVE term paper due. Apparently, I’m the only person committed to growing intellectually on this campus. (Sound about right, Tamara? Open a book for once.)

Some clown from my Post-Trotsky World-View class asked me if I wanted “to go watch Raiders-Chiefs and drink PBRs.” WHY WOULD I DO THAT? This is someone I immediately crossed off my list — he’s a loafer. I’m not: I’m balancing my studies with two part-time jobs M-F: (1) as a receptionist at a mid-sized PI firm in West Los Angeles (some ancient notes on that here); (2) as a librarian at a middle school I will not name for the sake of the youth. NO, I DON’T HAVE TIME TO SIT AROUND WATCHING SPORTS.

Predictably, as I walk across campus to the (empty) library, all the bars will be filled by 10 a.m. with dull men waiting for their football teams to play. While they waste inordinate amounts of time drinking 32 oz glasses of draft beer and eating spiced bird wings, I will be HAMMERING OUT A TERM PAPER that *might* have a tangible impact on the field of women’s studies — not to mention my GPA, which currently sits at 3.17.

That’s how serious and committed students do it at The New School.

* * *

Jenny’s Week Seven Picks:

DEN @ MIA – Denver 22, Miami 13
SD @ NYJ – San Diego 31, New York Jets 21
HOU @ TEN – Tennessee 32, Houston 31
ATL @ DET – Detroit 41, Atlanta 28
WAS @ CAR – Washington 19, Carolina 18
CHI @ TB - Tampa Bay 34, Chicago 19
SEA @ CLE – Seattle 28, Cleveland 17
PIT @ ARI – Pittsburgh 29, Arizona 23 (OT)
KC @ OAK – Kansas City 17, Oakland 16
GB @ MIN – Green Bay 51, Minnesota 10
SRL @ DAL – Dallas 33, St. Louis 7
IND @ NO – New Orleans 37, Indianapolis 16
BAL @ JAC – Baltimore 40, Jacksonville 17

Michael Bolton: That's the worst idea I've ever heard in my life, Tom (Image via blogspot.com)

Every year, we try to refrain from pulling a Tom Smykowski from Office Space, and jumping to any conclusions about the upcoming NFL season prematurely. In a sixteen-game season, it usually takes several games for teams to figure out their identity, and a lot longer than that to determine a realistic playoff picture.

So, while it’s tempting to draw knee-jerk reactions from a couple of games, we at least try to wait until the quarter-point mark to start making our hyperbolic and definitive statements about the season ahead. Even with the lockout-shortened off-season, four games is enough to get a sense of which teams are back in the driver’s seat (Packers, Patriots), and which teams are going to have trouble living up to expectations (Jets, Rams).

So without further adieu, here are our top 5 observations on the ol’ Jump To Conclusions mat:

1. 

   (Photo: Philly.com)

   The “Dream Team” is actually a Nightmare: This pre-season, the Philadelphia Eagles were crowned as NFC East Champions based almost solely on the big name signings made by GM Howie Roseman, who apparently attended the Dan Snyder school of Free Agency. Nnamdi Asomugha, Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie, Jason Babin and Cullen Jenkins were among the stars to join the Philadelphia roster, and Eagles fans were planning trips to the Super Bowl before a down had been played.

   Well, after a 1-3 start, the Eagles are proving that it takes more than just raw talent to win in the NFL, and chemistry can be the most important thing for a team to succeed. Plus, in the age of the salary cap, spending huge money at certain positions inevitably results in deficiencies elsewhere (see the Eagles LB corps), and so far the Philly defense has been a big disappointment. It will be interesting to see how Andy Reid – and the egos in his locker room – handles their early adversity.



(Photo: WashingtonPost.com)

2. The Detroit Lions will compete for the NFC crown: Yes, the Lions bandwagon is already starting to get crowded after starting the season 4-0 for the first time since 1980, and completing consecutive comebacks of 20 points or more against the Vikings and Cowboys.Ndamukong Suh and Calvin Johnson are unquestionably young superstars in this league, and if Matt Stafford can remain healthy, they give Jim Schwartz’ team a chance to compete in any game. And first round draft pick Nick Fairley could return from injury this week, making Detroit’s defense even more imposing. Bottom line: the Lions will make playoffs this year.
3. The Buffalo Bills are for real: The Bills are off to an impressive 3-1 start, and after defeating their hated rival Patriots in Week 3, they’re a fashionable pick to surprise in the AFC this year. Chan Gailey’s offense is clicking with Ryan Fitzpatrick, Fred Jackson and Steve Johnson off to a hot start, and the Bills defense has been opportunistic with 8 INTs. But those takeaways could be covering up for bigger problems on defense, and Buffalo faces a brutal schedule late in the season which will really test their road toughness. So while the Bills are definitely improved, and there’s reason for optimism in Buffalo, the division still goes through New England until someone proves otherwise.
4. Cam Newton is a superstar in the making: It took us a while to come around on this one, but Cam Newton is making believers out of even his biggest doubters after getting off to the best start of any rookie QB in NFL history.
   

   (Photo: CBSBoston.com)

   Newton has thrown for 1,386 yards and 5 TDs through four games, and has added 133 yards and 4 scores on the ground, making it look relatively easy along the way.  But as impressive as these numbers are, it’s Newton’s poise and presence on the field that is most mind-blowing to see from a rookie quarterback being thrown into the fire. So although the Panthers (1-3) still have a lot of holes ill, they know they have their leader for the next ten years in Newton.

5. Tim Tebow will start in Denver this season: Let’s face it – the Broncos just aren’t a very good football team right now. With the John Fox/John Elway era in it’s infancy, this is clearly a transitional period in Denver, and after a 1-3 start with Kyle Orton under center, the Broncos faithful are already clamoring for Tim Tebow. Billboards notwithstanding, if the Broncos continue to struggle, Fox has nothing to lose by giving the former Heisman trophy winner a shot. If nothing else, it will put to rest the questions, and give everyone a chance to see what Tebow can do in the NFL … and the Broncos can move forward with our without him.

Samir: Yes, this is horrible, this idea (Image via tumblr.com)

And a few more random early conclusions we’re not afraid to jump to:

• Aaron Rodgers and the Packers are making it look frighteningly easy so far. The defending champs are showing no signs of a hangover, and you can pencil them in as the #1 seed in the NFC playoffs.
• Jerry Jones will be dealing with questions about his boy Tony Romo all season, and the Cowboys will go as their manic QB goes (8-8)
• Not surprisingly, the Colts are screwed without Peyton Manning.

(photo courtesy of www.photobucket.com)

For anyone who watch football in the late 1970s and 1980s, Walter Payton was emblematic of all that was good in professional sports.  He was graceful on the field, and gracious off of it.  Soft spoken and dignified, Payton– or, perhaps more precisely, what we knew of Payton– was the kind of player– the kind of person– to emulate.  The NFL calls its man of the year award the Walter Payton Man of the Year Award for that very reason.   I was never a Bears fans.  But, like many others, I was always a fan of Walter Payton.

Twelve years after his untimely death, Sports Illustrated has excerpted a book by Jeff Pearlman alleging that Payton cheated on his wife and did drugs.  Why write this book?  While I don’t condone cheating on your wife or using drugs, I fundamentally do not understand why this book needs to be written, now.  For starters, the guy’s dead: he can’t defend himself.  Moreover, people don’t still look up to Payton (see point one, he’s dead).  Instead, they admire him for what he represented and, when they see an image of him dancing between defenders, the “C” emblazoned on his helmet, they think of when they were a kid.  When Sunday was spent glued to a television, watching the voracious Bears’ defense serve as the perfect compliment to Payton’s elegance.  Am I supposed to revisit that?  Question it?  Realize that, gee, idols aren’t always what they are cracked up to be when you peal away the onion?  Wow, there’s a novel and timely lesson for the 40-plus crowd that admired him.  Pearlman: for an encore, how about a book on the real truth behind the VHS versus Betamax fight for market share?

Enjoy this stroll down memory lane:

Ah yes … the Jets’ draft reach is one of the game’s grandest traditions, and we look forward to it continuing tonight.

Ben Roethlisberger's apartment was quite a challenge for Stanton and Menotti.

Nathaniel Stanton: Stanton and Menotti Contemporary Interiors, Nathaniel speaking.

Ben Roethlisberger: Hi, I’m calling to see if I could hire an interior decorator for my apartment.

NS: You have come to the right place! What is your name, sir?

BR: Ben Roethlisberger. My friends call me Big Ben.

NS: Outstanding!

BR: I play football for the Steelers.

NS: This is the game with all the men and the tight pants?

BR: Uh… yeah, I guess.

NS: What a delight! Do you have a particular look you would like for your apartment? Maybe something to design around? Art perhaps?

BR: Well, I have a Beers of the World poster and a collection of Fatheads.

NS: A Fat Head?

BR: These large, stick-on football players. You put them on your wall.

NS: So a Maximalists, perhaps. Do you have any furniture that you would like to keep? Just trying to get a sense… Would hate to give you English Chintz when you might really be looking for Neo-Bachelor Minimalism, if you know what I mean.

BR: I don’t think I have anything I need to keep. Oh that’s not true, I bought a replica of Dumbledore’s chair from the Harry Potter movies. I like to sit on that chair with a bucket of hot chicken on my lap and search for foreign nudie movies on Netflix streaming and make my way through a 12-pack.

NS: An heirloom piece… I see. We must keep it. Do you entertain?

BR: Well, sometimes Hines will come over and cook me dinner if we have had a tough practice. He likes to put on an a tiny apron and make a roast. We unwind together. He calls it, “us time.” I also will sometimes just call random numbers at the college and if a girl answers, invite her over.

Nathaniel creates an inviting, minimalist bedroom while still highlighting Big Ben's favorite Fathead from his extensive collection. (Photo: Nathaniel Stanton)

NS: It almost sounds like you might do well with Amherst Fraternity Casual, a mix of high and low pieces, a masculine presence, almost Scandinavian youth hostel if you will, where you could spill a Natural Light and not worry about it, but one where you would feel comfortable slipping on some silk pajamas and having a nice glass of merlot with your intriguing friend Hines on an indulgent couch upholstered in the finest Austrian mohair.

BR: That sounds like it exactly.

NS: Smashing! I think it might be best if I make a trip over with some measuring tape and my pad and see if we can’t come up with something that fits your lifestyle. We have to get the colors right. Maybe something emerald, indigo, or maybe we just go with goats eye. The floors will have to be lacquered black…or white, something that you could easily mop up if someone vomits, but so shiny you could see up a co-ed’s skirt.

BR: Get out of my head Nathaniel!

NS: We are simpatico! When can I pop over?

BR: Any time is fine. My schedule is currently wide open.

NS: See you tomorrow afternoon; get ready for some fabric samples!

NFL.com's Adam Rank envisions a Tom Zbikowski vs. Ochocinco bout. (NFL.com)

NFL.com bloggers and fantasy guru Adam Rank has imagined the ultimate NFL fight card, headlined by (real fighter) Tom Zbikowski vs. (real talker) Ochocinco. Take a look! NFL.com’s illustration/design team came up with the poster, which we’d love to hang on our wall!

(Chart via WSJ.com)

Ever feel like you spend more time on Sundays watching commercials and talking heads than you do watching football being played? Well, The Wall Street Journal Online put together this fascinating breakdown of four recent NFL broadcasts, and you might be amazed at how little of the 3-hour plus broadcast is devoted to actual gameplay.

According to the study, in an average pro football game, the ball is in play for only ELEVEN minutes. Which means that during a 60-minute game, 49 minutes are whittled away while the clock runs between plays. And since the average play only lasts around 4 seconds, that puts ratio of inaction to action during a game at approximately 10:1 … and that’s just while the clock is running!

So what do the networks do with the other 174 minutes in a typical broadcast? Not surprisingly, commercials take up about an hour. As many as 75 minutes, or about 60% of the total air time, excluding commercials, is spent on shots of players huddling, standing at the line of scrimmage or just generally milling about between snaps. In the four broadcasts The Journal studied, injured players got six more seconds of camera time than celebrating players. While the network announcers showed up on screen for just 30 seconds, shots of the head coaches and referees took up about 7% of the average show.

I guess this really shouldn’t come as a shock, should it? I mean, we already know that football has a lot of dead time in between plays, and with the added value of commercial revenue over the years, we’ve seen a gradual increase in TV time-outs to help pad the league’s bank accounts.  And just because the ball hasn’t been snapped, doesn’t mean there’s nothing going on. Football is a chess match, and the adjustments & decisions that are made between plays can effect the outcome as much as the plays themselves.

But if you’re interested in a more detailed breakdown of how those precious minutes of your life (which you’ll never get back) are being wasted, go ahead and click on the banner image above.

Pat Shurmur has his work cut out for him. (Source: Statesmen.com)

Cleveland Browns head coach Pat Shurmur faces the same tall task that left Chris Palmer, Butch Davis, Romeo Crennel and Eric Mangini in shreds: Winning an AFC North division inhabited by the Pittsburgh Steelers and Baltimore Ravens, two of football’s most consistently successful franchises.

Each new Browns regime shuffled out before a bewildered fanbase claims some deep understanding of the Pittsburgh and Baltimore rivalries, but nothing has changed. The Browns have been manhandled within the division since their return.

Baltimore is despised by Browns fans, but with Ozzie Newsome running the show, they’ve forged an identity built on bone-crushing defense and just enough offense to win. Pittsburgh — heading to its eighth Super Bowl and third since 2005 — is perhaps the most sound organization in the league, with just three coaches since 1969.

Cleveland’s had five since ’99 — and it shows.

The Steelers and Ravens have beat up on the AFC North with excellent drafts, a low level of in-house chaos and a self-belief that the Super Bowl is a realistic end goal every season. Baltimore, of course, strives to be what Pittsburgh is today, while the Browns appear endlessly stuck in neutral, still in search of an identity.

Peyton Hillis captured the imagination of Browns fans this season by blowing through defensive fronts — including Baltimore’s for 144 yards in September. Hillis was an instant hit. We all heard over and over that the bruising back embodied “Browns football.”

But what is “Browns football”?

In one sense, it harks back to Cleveland’s teams of yesteryear — dominating squads that more closely resembled today’s Baltimore and Pittsburgh outfits than anything the current Browns have put on the field.

It also references the type of ball a city like Cleveland would like to see — first: a winner; second: a team that punishes on both sides of the ball; third: hard-working, salt-of-the-earth players like Hillis who get what it means to represent the city.

Since 1999, however, “Browns football” has meant something very different.

Cleveland’s running attack has long resembled that of a football team operating on the ice planet Hoth. Minus two seasons, the Browns have never finished better than 20th in the NFL.

The passing game numbers are even more abysmal:

All of this is tied to bad drafts, talent-poor rosters, obsessive-compulsive regime changes, and the fact that four games a year come against Pittsburgh and Baltimore.

The Browns generated some excitement in 2010, but they also stalled frequently, especially down the stretch.

As much as Eric Mangini is to be credited for instilling discipline back into a team that was in shambles when he arrived, the final result — especially continued problems in the passing game — were all Holmgren needed to see to call for a change.

Browns fans don't want to see Peyton Hillis backburnered in next season's shift to the West Coast offense. (Source: AP)

Shurmur — like every coach before him — addressed the AFC North in his opening presser, but the division has never been tougher.

The Browns have a ways to go to compete.

What they must do to turn the ship around is no mystery, but each of the following to-dos have been elusive for this franchise. A team like Pittsburgh has checked all these boxes, and that’s why they’re in Dallas right now.

To succeed in the NFL, the Browns must…

10. Successfully negotiate a perilous offseason

When the collective bargaining agreement expires in March, if a new agreement hasn’t been reached, football as we know it will cease.

The slow pace of negotiations between the owners and the players’ union suggests that a work stoppage is almost unavoidable. For how long? We don’t know.

Tough year to be a rookie head coach. If there’s a strike, players cannot practice, rehab at team facilities or sign with new clubs. Outside of the draft in April, the Browns would have no way to gather new players and overhaul the roster as needed.

If a new CBA is reached, we aren’t sure what free agency will look like under the new deal. Without an agreement, there can be no player-for-draft-pick trades before or during the draft.

Shurmur will be challenged in forging relationships with existing players, and general manager Tom Heckert, who has acknowledged that the team needs to replace a flock of aging players, could have his hands tied.

While all teams face a similar struggle, those teams with long-standing coaching staffs and front offices are at a clear advantage. Moreover, the less-talented teams will be challenged to find ways to improve the roster.

There are a lot of unknowns here, but one positive for the Browns is that Holmgren, Shurmur and Heckert appear to be of one mind. They’ll need to be to navigate these rocky waters.

First question: Will there be on-field action in 2011? (Source: Time)

9. Nail the draft

The 2011 NFL Draft is set to take place regardless of the CBA drama.

This year’s draft represents one of the only guaranteed ways to add talent to the roster.

Heckert’s 2010 draft — hauling in Colt McCoy, Joe Haden and T.J. Ward (along with injured wild-card Montario Hardesty) — must be followed by another strong showing.

The Ravens and Steelers consistently reload the roster with home-grown talent.

We can sit here and debate endlessly on who the Browns will pursue and select. Doesn’t matter. Come draft day, only Heckert and friends make the picks that count.

The draft has never been more critical for the Browns.

8. Swap out aging veterans for talented youth

Before this season, the Browns were ranked as the 12th-oldest team in the NFL with a average age of 27.18 years.

That’s not fatal when your savvy veterans lead you to the playoffs year after year (for instance, the Steelers were the seventh-oldest team at 27.5 years).

Youth, on its own, solves nothing in the NFL, but failing to retool an aging (and losing roster) is an invitation for the floor to fall out.

Make no mistake about it, sweeping roster changes are ahead.

The team is flush with Mangini-era Jets. If the CBA situation allows any time for transactions and overhaul, most of these 30-something Mangenius disciples won’t be on the team come September.

Beyond age, new schemes on offense and defense will require players who fit the mold. Again, a genuine challenge for a team in transition.

7. If switching to the 4-3, move swiftly

The assumed switch to the 4-3 under defensive coordinator Dick Jauron presents immediate challenges for Cleveland.

The lack of talent along the defensive line makes switching away from the 3-4, which they’ve run since 2005, that much more difficult. While the Browns secondary won’t endure a total transition, the defensive linemen and linebackers on Cleveland’s roster were chosen for the 3-4. (Aside from last season’s inexplicable — and, for Rob Ryan and Mangini, foreboding — trade for Jayme Mitchell, a 4-3 defensive end who questioned why the Browns even brought him on board. The move is clearer now.)

Shaun Rogers has played in a 4-3, but many of the existing Browns have not. There’s been chatter about moving Matt Roth and/or Marcus Benard from linebacker to defensive end, but a position switch often requires a full season to take root — this isn’t high school football.

Last time the Browns switched from the 3-4 to the 4-3, Michael Dean Perry ensured a smooth transition. (Source: Cleveland.com)

The Browns switched from the 3-4 to 4-3 when Bud Carson took over for Marty Schottenheimer in 1989. They had a full offseason to finesse the move, and a roster loaded with defensive talent, headlined by defensive lineman Michael Dean Perry.

Perry wasn’t used enough during his rookie season under Schottenheimer, but his speed and explosiveness compelled Marty to experiment with four down lineman on nickel packages.

In 1989, Carson made Perry the centerpiece of his 4-3 — a transition helped by a pool of talented defensive linemen. That’s not the case with today’s team.

Cleveland’s current roster will have issues running the 4-3 in 2011. Aging defenders playing out of their natural position, in a new scheme, could be a recipe for disaster in the AFC North, where the Browns (again) are the only team with new coaches and a new philosophy on both sides of the ball.

On the bright side, it’s not as if the team’s scrapping a 3-4 defense that’s accomplished much. Heckert acknowledged this month that the team — 3-4 or 4-3 — will see massive personnel changes.

It’s an interesting (and perhaps dangerous) time to flip defensive philosophies, but the team hired Holmgren to mold the club in his image, and he’s leaned on the 4-3 for almost his entire career.

6. Commit To Colt McCoy and Don’t Look Back

Colt McCoy: Maybe one of the best quarterback names ever?

McCoy certainly had his moments during eight uneven starts. He threw for nearly 300 yards against the Steelers, knocked off the New Orleans Saints and dismantled the New England Patriots in his first three NFL games — naturally, Browns fans fell in love.

McCoy also looked very much like a rookie down the stretch.

Nearly 20 years have passed since Cleveland’s had a legitimate quarterback. Many of the team’s troubles can be traced to the absence of capable leader at the position, and you’re going nowhere in the AFC North without one. Joe Flacco has taken Baltimore to the playoffs in each of his first three seasons, and Big Ben — well, he’s right up there with Tom Brady when it comes to winning big games.

Unlike with Flacco and Roethlisberger, people question if McCoy has the arm strength to take a cold-weather team to the Super Bowl.

His height has been critiqued endlessly. And he looks 17 out there. But there’s no questioning his heart.

Sometimes, all the logical doubts don’t matter. Perhaps Colt isn’t the long-term answer at quarterback, but in the complete absence of another option, the Browns need to press into McCoy, hand him the reigns and go for it.

The addition of Mark Whipple has the potential to be a roaring positive. Whipple, of course, coached Big Ben during his few seasons in the league. Roethlisberger went 13-0 as a rookie and won a Super Bowl in his second season. The Whipple hire — along with Shurmur and Holmgren in the building — provide McCoy with an all-star cadre of teachers.

5. Surround McCoy With Legitimate Wideouts

The team lacks a receiver who opponents need to game plan for — or even consider.

Tight end Ben Watson led the team with 763 yards receiving and Hillis had 477. The Browns leading wide receiver, Mohamed Massaquoi had only 6 yards more than Hillis, with 483. The putrid receiver play only makes Hillis’ work on the ground (1,177 yards) that much more impressive.

Not to dismiss the wideouts entirely, because Massaquoi and Brian Robiskie are both growing into their roles, while Chansi Stuckey has the chance to be a serviceable possession receiver.

The problem is that none of these guys are better than a No. 2, if that. Mo Mass, if paired with a legitimate No. 1, could bloom (he had a few big games when Braylon Edwards was still with the team). Add a top-flight wideout and suddenly this young group of receivers isn’t half bad. Right now, they’re each playing one slot higher than where they naturally belong.

4. Embrace The WCO

Does a shift to the West Coast offense make sense in the brutal AFC North? Will a pass-first philosophy nullify Hillis and pull the team away from the hard-hitting style of football they played in 2010?

Shurmur and Holmgren have reiterated that the WCO doesn’t require shelving the running game (see: Shaun Alexander of the Seattle Seahawks). But, as Shurmur has stated, the offense will be “seen through the eyes of the quarterback.”

Shurmur and Whipple were hired to mentor McCoy and build an offense around the young quarterback — assuming he remains their guy. The Browns hired Holmgren to oversee football operations. It was just a matter of time before he implemented the system he knows and trusts — the one that’s helped him reach two Super Bowls and win 174 games in the NFL (including 13 in the postseason).

The organization is fully committed to the WCO and — frankly — to see the Browns on the same page about anything is a good indicator of things to come.

Second-year starter Colt McCoy is now surrounded by a flock of proven teachers. (Source: NFL.com)

3. No more two-year coaching stints

It’s a tough time to begin again, but Browns fans have no option but to ride this one out and see how Holmgren’s master plan unfolds.

This regime is not responsible for the trainwrecks of the past.

Those calling Mangini’s retention in 2010 a waste of a season are both right and wrong. It might not have been entirely fair to Mangini — if Holmgren was always planning to go in another direction. Had Mangini won 12 games, he’d still be here, but to ask him to do more than he did with this season’s injury-riddled roster was asking a lot.

Shurmur has a better chance of succeeding by inheriting what Mangini left versus what Crennell and Savage left Mangini.

The team is starting over again, but the extra year gave Holmgren a chance to overhaul the entire organization, allowing Shurmur to walk into a situation that should run like a well-oiled machine (relative, at least, to the chaos Cleveland’s endured since 1999).

The best thing for Cleveland football is a front office and coach that remain intact for a decade — with Randy Lerner sending boxes of cash from his Aston Villa owner’s box.

Let Holmgren run the football show while this guy dishes out the dead presidents. (Source: Mirrorfootball.co.uk)

2. Data Wipe The Past

Forget The Drive.

Erase memories of The Fumble.

Throw out all existing footage of Red Right 88.

And forgive Dwayne Rudd.

The terrible past must be put in a box and shipped out to sea.

The Browns will morph into a national sensation if they turn the ship around — New Orleans Saints times 1,000. A lot of that starts with clearing the memory bank and allowing this regime to operate without the weight of yesterday’s failures. The fans have every right to feel immense frustration from the events of the past 25 years, but it might help to keep in mind that McCoy, for instance, was 4 months old when The Drive went down.

1. Pray

That’s what it might take to win the AFC North next season — but stranger things have happened. In today’s NFL, every season is witness to young teams rising up unpredictably.

The Steelers and Ravens are two of football’s best, but every season is littered with variables.

The Browns, perception-wise, are annual losers, but fans who watched the team in 2010 saw a squad that played hard in almost every game and refused to give up. That’s a good indicator of a tight-knit group.

In the final analysis, the team faces some immense challenges in 2011, but the long-term plan to build a streamlined football program with everyone on the same page — well, that’s been the biggest difference between the Browns and the NFL’s elite over the past decade.

While many Browns fans are burnt out — and understandably so — it’s today’s team more than any other since the return that offers hope.