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HASSELHOFF-LIKE WEBINAR-OFF

By C-O-U-R-T-N-E-Y!

Like Baywatch and Knight-Rider before it, this week’s Webinar-Off is a timeless match-up between the forces of good (Cowboys) and evil (Giants).   Dallas puts the flailing, frailing, and failing Giants out of their misery today because:

1. The Giants don’t have Vince Young to bring off the bench-  The first time these two teams played, the Giants played with the same confidence that the resurgent Tennessee Titans are playing with now.    Mario Manningham ate the Cowboys’ secondary for lunch, catching 10 passes for 150 yards and a score on a 49 yard bomb from a sharp Eli Manning.  Steve Smith added 134 more yards and a score.   That game was emblematic of the Giants 5-0 start as they answered every punch the Cowboys threw with one of their own.  The Giants were a down-hill running, aggressive in the passing game, confident team on offensive that played well-enough on defense to corral the Cowboys’ big play threats.  Evenly matched in terms of talent, the difference was that the Giants imposed their will on the Cowboys when it counted.   The Giants simply aren’t that team anymore.  Since that game, Manningham has put up pedestrian numbers (only one game with 100+ yards receiving), Manning has regressed, Brandon Jacobs has become “tip-toe” Jacobs, and the Giants’ defense has been so lackluster that Usi Umenyiora and Fred Robbins are being benched.  The Giants are morphing into what the Cowboys were: soft.   Injuries are part of it, but whatever it is, this team has lost its edge and there are no signs that the Giants will get it back in time to win today’s game or salvage what was once a promising season.

2.  Mike Jenkins has reported for duty-  The last time they matched up, the Cowboys started Orlando Scandrick opposite Terrence Newman.  That was the last game Scandrick started, in part because of how he performed against the Giants but also because of the emergence of Mike Jenkins.  Jenkins has, in the eyes of many, usurped Newman’s role as the best corner on the team– flashing the ability and aggressiveness that made him a first round talent two years ago.  Jenkins has every reason to be motivated for today’s game if for no other reason than to avenge his much-discussed terrible tackling effort against Derrick Ward in his rookie season.   Though Jenkins’ and Newman’s ability to cover has not resulted in as many turnovers as one would expect, it has allowed Dallas the opportunity to put more pressure on the quarterback.   It has also allowed Dallas to simplify its schemes on defense, which has allowed the Cowboys to avoid the big play breakdowns that killed them against the Giants.  Without a legitimate running threat, look for the Cowboys defensive to be more stout today as Jenkins and Newman make matters tougher on their receiving  counterparts.

3.  The Cowboys have Miles to go-  As with Jenkins, Miles Austin has emerged since the Cowboys-Giants first match up.  Austin leads the NFL with six touchdown catches of 20 yards are more and has helped take the heat off of Roy Williams.  Coupled with the Barber, Choice, and Jones triumverate in the backfield, and the ever-reliable Witten, Austin gives the Cowboys the stretch-the-field weapon that they need to test the Giants’ thin secondary.  Also look for Dallas to do more of what they did against the Raiders on Thanksgiving– crossing patterns with Austin– to see if Aaron Ross & Co. can keep up with the speedy Austin.

4.  It’s December-  The Giants need this win to save their season. Believe it or not: the 8-3 Cowboys do also.  Dallas’ struggles in December are well-documented.   If Dallas wants to be a team that matters in the playoffs they need to start by showing that they can put teams like the Giants away.   Dallas has been focused on their performance in this season’s final month all year–  as Bradie James said this week, the time is now to show everyone that this is not the same old fold ‘em Cowboys.   Look for the Cowboys to match the Giants intensity today.

5. The Giants will be tighter than Tiger Woods on his wedding anniversary-  The Giants look and feel like a team on the verge of imploding.   While I don’t think that will happen today, I do think the Giants remind me a bit of last year’s Cowboys.   When the going get tough, they play tight, fall behind, and just don’t have enough gumption to win in the end.

Dallas 24, Giants 21.

Fufkin: you agree?

CONTINUE AFTER THE JUMP FOR ARTIEFUFKIN’S RESPONSE

Whatchyou talkin' 'bout C-O-U-R-T-N-E-Y?!?

First off, the only thing that makes this Webinar-Off Hasselhoff-like is the fact that C-O-U-R-T-N-E-Y (possibly the most annoying handle in the world to type out) was obviously hammered drunk when he wrote this post.  In fact, here’s video of C-O-U-R-T having breakfast this morning:

As I mentioned previously, last Thursday’s Giants/Broncos game pretty much sucked the life force out of me, and left me questioning if this Giants team could even win another game this season.  You could say it’s been a combination of things (injuries, poor coaching, and a general lack of fire) but there’s no question that the Giants team that has lost 5 of the last 6 games is a shell of its former self, and is desperately searching to regain it’s identity.

Today’s game against the Cowboys is the Giants last chance to right the ship, and salvage any hopes of making the post-season.  And that’s the thing: as awful as they’ve played of late, at 6-5, the Giants still control their own destiny. With their next three games against the Cowboys, Eagles and Redskins, the Giants can quickly put themselves back in the hunt for the division title.  But that’s only if – and this is a big IF – they can find their man clothes again and stop playing like a bunch of Sallies.

I could sit here and dissect the X’s and O’s of this match-up all day, but the bottom line is that this game – like all Giants/Cowboys games – will come down to who wants it more.  And with their backs against the wall, on their home turf, against a perennially winter-soft Dallas team, I believe that the Giants will come out fighting.  The pass rush will once again wreak havoc on Tony Romo, and the Giants will have success running the ball with Jacobs and Bradshaw (who is returning from injury).  I imagine the Cowboys will connect on a few big plays against the Giants lame secondary, but Romo will once again fold down the stretch, and the NY Defense will come up with a big stop when it matters to preserve the win.

This game is all about pride.  And the New York Football Giants need to remember who they are, and what they’re all about as a franchise, and carry that pride onto the field today.  I can only hope that Coughlin plays this video in the locker room before the game:

Giants 21, Cowboys 13