14
Sep
2009
Buffalo Bills Fieldhouse: Thursday Morning Coaches Office
By steverodgers
Trent Edwards: [knocking] Coach, can I come in?
Dick Jauron: Oh, sure, come on in, JP!
TE: Uh, Coach, it’s me, Trent. JP doesn’t play for the team anymore.
DJ: Oh! That’s right. So many players in and out of here, I feel like a doorman at Marshall Fields. Have a seat. I am just going over the playbook, trying to figure out what might work against the Jets on Monday night.
TE: Patriots.
DJ: Exactly! Rod Rust has a good brain, have to watch what he is up to… very tricky man. Best coach in the league if you ask me.
TE: Um… Coach, about the playbook…
DJ: Too confusing? Bit of a brain buster isn’t it!? Holy smokes, hang on to your seats, Patriots!
TE: Well, I was going to say that I was talking to the guys and we were remarking that it seems a little thin. I mean it’s not a playbook, more like a pamphlet, like a long memo or something. There are only 8 plays?
DJ: 16! They can go left or right! Plus we have that hot read audible! As a coach sometimes you have to let your dogs off the leash and make their own choices. I have faith in you, JP! Hot read!
TE: Trent. Don’t you think we could use some more plays, maybe a couple of shotgun formations?
DJ: I’ve been in this league a long time. 16 plays are more than enough. Look at this playbook! My arm hurts just lifting it. I think we will just stick with what’s working.
TE: Working? Our offense is a mess, sir.
DJ: A mess?! We’re good enough for 8 and 8! You know what 8 and 8 is on the Buffalo Bills?
TE: No.
DJ: Employed!
TE: Ah okay… I’ll just get my stuff ready for the flight then. Thanks for listening, Coach. [leaves office]
DJ: Anytime! My door is always open! Now where was I? Rod Rust, you wily old snake! You won’t get me this time!
[knocking]
DJ: JP, is that you again!?
Terrell Owens: Just me, Coach! Terrel! I misplaced me parrot!
DJ: Yellow and Blue? I think I saw him winging around in Turk’s old office. Wow! Your pirate hat is smashing son, absolutely smashing!
TO: Arrrrrrr!
[...] Oh, sure, come on in, JP! TE: Uh, Coach, it’s me, Trent. JP doesn’t play for the team.original article Share and [...]
Hahahaha…you’re funny man.
Thank you. Although a couple of boneheaded plays aside, the Bill looked pretty good last night.
I like stories with pirate hats in them. – Jenny Silver
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